Author's Note: This essay is adapted from a speech I delivered at a family gathering several years ago, when my father, who was present, was sick with a terminal illness. It weaves together two consecutive Torah portions - Shemot and Vayechi - to explore what it means to truly live rather than merely survive.

The Staff and the Serpent: Living and Surviving

Moses stands before the burning bush and asks, "What is your name?" The response: "אהיה אשר אהיה" - "I am what I am" or "I will be what I will be." (Exodus 3:14) As we know, God can be described in many ways, and this particular name is not the standard one either. Then God makes an extraordinary promise: "ואמרתי אעלה אתכם מעני מצרים, ושמעו לקולך" - "I will bring you up from the affliction of Egypt, and they will listen to your voice." (Exodus 3:18) The people will listen. They will follow. The promise is explicit. And Moses responds: "והן לא יאמינו לי ולא ישמעו בקולי" - "But they will not believe me, and they will not listen to my voice." (Exodus 4:1) This is strange. God has just told him they will listen. Why is Moses saying they won't?

The Staff and the Snake

God asks him: "מה זה בידך" - "What is this in your hand?" "ויאמר מטה" - "And he said: A staff." But why is God asking? He obviously knows what Moses is holding. Rashi explains that we should read מה זה as מזה שבידך - "from this that is in your hand" - meaning that Moses should be punished with what is in his hand, the staff, for falsely accusing Israel of not listening. Then God commands: Throw it to the ground. "וישלכהו ארצה ויהי לנחש" - "And he threw it to the ground, and it became a serpent." (Exodus 4:3) What is happening here? Why does the staff become a serpent? And what does this have to do with Moses' false accusation? To understand this, we need to turn to the previous week's Torah portion.

The Brothers' Fear

In the final chapter of Genesis, after Jacob's death, the brothers grow anxious. They approach Joseph with a story - claiming Jacob had commanded on his deathbed that Joseph must forgive them for selling him into slavery. But the verse reveals something strange about their fear: "ויראו אחי יוסף כי מת אביהם ויאמרו לו ישטמנו יוסף" - "And Joseph's brothers saw that their father died, and they said: Perhaps Joseph will hate us..." (Genesis 50:15)

The Brothers' Anxious Realization

What is the connection between these two events? The verse says they saw that Jacob died, and therefore said "perhaps Joseph hates us." The obvious reading would be: Now that Jacob is dead, perhaps Joseph will finally act on his hatred - the restraint is removed. But that's not what the verse says. It says "לו ישטמנו" - "perhaps he hates us" - as if the hatred itself is suddenly in question, not merely its expression. What did they see about Jacob's death that made them uncertain whether Joseph hated them at all?

The Assertion That Challenges Everything: "Jacob Did Not Die"

R' Yonasan Eibeshitz, in Yaarot Devash, provides a framework for this episode. We begin with a cryptic statement from our sages. The sages declare: "יעקב אבינו לא מת" - "Jacob our father did not die." (Taanit 5b) The Talmud immediately objects: Is it for naught that they embalmed and mummified him? We saw his funeral. What can this possibly mean? The sages respond: "We compare him to his descendants - just as they are alive, so is he alive." But this deepens the mystery rather than resolving it. Jacob's being alive is somehow conditional on his descendants being alive? His death or life depends on their state? How does this make sense?

A Clue in the Singular Verb

We find our first clue at Mount Sinai. The Torah describes their arrival: "ויחן שם ישראל נגד ההר" - "And Israel camped there opposite the mountain." (Exodus 19:2) Notice the verb is singular - vayichan, "he camped" - though we're speaking of an entire nation. Rashi, quoting the sages, explains this as reflecting their perfect unity: "כאיש אחד בלב אחד" - like one person with one heart. The singular verb captures the people's unprecedented togetherness at that moment. But the Zohar reads this differently. The singular, it says, doesn't refer to the people's unity at all. It refers to Israel himself - Jacob, who was renamed Israel. The verse is telling us that Jacob was literally present at Sinai. These two readings - the people's unity and Jacob's presence - seem unrelated. But they will prove to be saying the same thing.

The Midrash's Cryptographic Center

We need one more piece before the pattern becomes clear. The Torah, in Leviticus, discusses forbidden foods: "כל הולך על גחון" - "Everything that crawls on its belly..." (Leviticus 11:42) The Midrash makes a cryptic statement about this verse: "At the vav of gachon, Jacob died." R' Yonasan Eibeshitz brings two interpretations of this enigmatic teaching. The first is numerical. The vav of גחון is the exact midpoint letter of the Torah. The Torah contains 600,000 letters, corresponding to the 60 myriad souls of Israel. The midpoint - 300,000 letters - corresponds to 30 myriad people. A Midrash teaches that Jacob passed away when the nation had already reached 30 myriad. So the vav of gachon - the Torah's center - marks the moment when Jacob died at the numerical halfway point of Israel's growth. The second interpretation is symbolic. This verse discusses the prohibition against eating slithering serpents. And we know from the verse "כי לא נחש ביעקב" (Numbers 23:23) - "There is no serpent in Jacob" - that the serpent and Jacob are opposites, mutually exclusive principles. Where the serpent principle appears, Jacob must withdraw. Therefore, at the Torah's center, where we encounter the serpent verse, that is where Jacob departs. These two interpretations will prove to be one.

What is Death, For a Tzaddik?

R' Yonasan now provides the framework for understanding these teachings: Death, he explains, is painful separation. As the verse in Ruth states: "כי המות יפריד ביני ובינך" - "For death will separate between me and you." (Ruth 1:17) For most people, this means the separation of the soul from the corporeal body. But for a tzaddik - one who lived a spiritual life, attached to the One Above - this separation is not painful. It is liberation. The departure from bodily existence is a return to life, not death. Therefore, death for a tzaddik must refer to something else: the painful separation experienced by those left behind. It is their loss when the soul of the righteous departs from them.

Jacob Did Not Depart

Since death for a tzaddik means departure from those left behind, when we say "יעקב אבינו לא מת" - Jacob did not die - it must mean he did not depart from us. The Zohar explains: The spirit of Jacob continues to hover over his offspring, to protect them and join with them. We find him present at every major historical moment - at the Red Sea ("וירא ישראל" - Exodus 14:31), at Sinai ("ויחן שם ישראל נגד ההר"). His presence did not withdraw. But under what conditions does this presence dwell? And when does it depart?

Two Principles in Opposition

Jacob represents wholeness and completeness - "יעקב איש תם" (Genesis 25:27). The serpent represents separation. It is the serpent who caused death - which means separation. He separated us from Eden. He drove a wedge between humanity and God. The serpent is the principle of division itself. And we know from the verse "כי לא נחש ביעקב" (Numbers 23:23) - "There is no serpent in Jacob" - that the serpent and Jacob are opposites, mutually exclusive principles. Therefore Jacob, who is the antithesis of the serpent, did not die - did not separate. But if there is separation and strife below, the spirit of Jacob cannot dwell in that serpentine environment. Now we return to the vav of gachon, and we see how both interpretations unite: The vav of גחון is both (1) the verse about the serpent - where the separation principle appears, and (2) the halfway mark of the Torah's letters - representing Israel split in half, 30 myriad of the eventual 60 myriad. When Israel is divided, that is the place of the serpent. In that place, the spirit of Jacob departs: "תמן מת יעקב."

Sinai Revisited

We return now to Mount Sinai, and we see that Rashi and the Zohar are saying the same thing: Rashi: The singular verb means they were in unity, with one heart - "כאיש אחד בלב אחד". Zohar: The singular refers to Jacob himself being present. These are identical statements. Where there is unity, Jacob's presence dwells. Unity and Jacob's presence are the same phenomenon.

The Brothers' Diagnosis

Now we can return to Genesis 50 and understand what the brothers perceived. "ויראו כי מת אביהם" - They saw that their father died. They sensed that the spirit of Jacob had separated from them. They did not feel his presence. They knew that the essence of Jacob - wholeness, תמימות - can only dwell where there is unity. If Jacob's presence has withdrawn, there must be division among them. "לו ישטמנו יוסף" - Perhaps Joseph hates us. They correctly diagnosed that Jacob's withdrawal indicated serpentine separation had entered, and they identified Joseph's potential hatred as the source of that division. The hatred was not independent of Jacob's death - it was the cause. The machloket, the division, drove Jacob's spirit away.

The Serpent Translated: A Modern Key

We have established the traditional framework with precision. But now we must ask: What does "the serpent" really mean? What does it mean that Jacob is its antithesis? What does "Jacob didn't die" really mean? And why is this intrinsically connected to peace and unity?

Eden and the Pattern

To find the answer, we must return to the archetypal story of Eden. In the primordial Garden of Eden, there was no fear and no survival anxiety. Everything was simply there. There were no needs and no death. Only the Divine Presence. No separation between self and other, between body and soul, between the divine will and human experience. Just presence, being, existence. The name of God is יהוה - a formulation of letters that defines existence: was, is, will be. Simply existence, presence and being, at every level. This is the highest definition of reality. And when man was in harmony with God, this was man's reality as well. But God introduced the serpent. This refers to ego consciousness - something that sees itself as separate. That can make a choice other than the divine will. That experiences itself as a distinct entity over against everything else. The introduction of the ego, and the separateness that emerges from it, severs man from harmony with divine wholeness. This is represented by the serpent with the forked tongue. Linguistically, the word for serpent, נחש, is intimately related to the prohibition "לא תנחשו" (Leviticus 19:26) - "you shall not engage in divination." Divination is the anxious attempt to prognosticate and control the future, the very opposite of being "תמים תהיה עם ה' אלהיך" - "wholehearted/fully present with the Lord your God" (Deuteronomy 18:13). The serpent, therefore, introduced נחש into human consciousness: future-anxiety, calculative survivalism, the severing of present trust. And this separation brought the pain of death, the exile from Eden, the struggle for existence. The punishment was explicit: "בזיעת אפך תאכל לחם" (Genesis 3:19) - "By the sweat of your brow you shall eat bread." You must now struggle to survive as a separate being. Food will require effort. Existence will be anxious maintenance. You will constantly calculate tomorrow's needs. You will fight to continue being this separate self. Survival mode itself is the curse, the consequence of serpentine consciousness.

The Modern Translation

This ancient framework—serpent as separation, Jacob as wholeness—finds a striking parallel in our understanding of the human mind itself. Modern psychology recognizes distinct modes of functioning in human consciousness: Executive functioning - mediated by the cortex, especially the vastly enlarged prefrontal regions that distinguish human brains. Planning, abstract reasoning, self-reflection, moral deliberation. Uniquely human capacities. Emotional complexity - involving the limbic system, which is far more developed in mammals than in reptiles. Fear, attachment, joy, grief. The rich emotional life we share with other mammals. Survival reflexes - the most primitive mode, involving brain stem structures and autonomic responses. Fight-flight-freeze, basic threat detection, autonomic regulation. Reptiles operate primarily in this domain - reflexive, survival-oriented responses to environmental threat. These systems interact, but any can dominate consciousness. Reptiles are reflexively dominant. Mammals add emotional depth. Humans possess the cortical capacity for executive self-awareness - but we can still get trapped in survival mode.

The Human Condition

People who experience trauma often get stuck in survival mode. They are conditioned by their trauma to remain in defensive consciousness - fight, flight, freeze. Unable to rise above it. And we are all, in some form, traumatized. Our learned patterns keep us stuck in survival mode and rob us of present living. The anxious maintenance of the separate self becomes our default state. But this is precisely our challenge and our mission - to transcend survival consciousness and access the integrated wholeness that is true living.

The Mission

The mission we have is to restore ourselves to a higher level of consciousness, to the uniquely human mind. To rise above mere survival. That is our life's work, and that is considered true life. To simply survive is not to live. To be consumed by fighting to survive, by anxiety about tomorrow, one is robbed of presence in the now. And the current moment is the only life one has. This is what survival mode steals: the present. And the present is all there is.

Jacob: The Achievement of True Life

Jacob represents the ultimate human achievement - the one whose face is on the throne of glory, the one who achieved consciousness beyond the ego. "יעקב איש תם" - Jacob is whole, without separation. He is the living embodiment of the commandment "תמים תהיה עם ה' אלהיך" - "Be wholehearted/fully present with the Lord your God." His temimut is not naïve simplicity, but integrated wholeness. It is the state of being entirely present, without the fracture of serpentine calculation. "ויחי יעקב" (Genesis 47:28) - He lived. He actually lived - not merely survived. "יעקב אבינו לא מת" - He did not die. He did not experience painful separation. "כי לא נחש ביעקב" - There is no serpent in Jacob. No divination, no future-anxiety. He was not stuck in reptilian survival consciousness. Here we see the two sides of the same coin: While embodied, Jacob actually lived - present, integrated, whole in consciousness. Not trapped in clinging to bodily existence, not consumed by survival mode, not anxiously calculating tomorrow. And upon departing the body, he did not die - experienced no painful separation. Because one who was never trapped in body-consciousness, never clinging to the separate self, experiences leaving the body as liberation, not loss. These are not separate achievements but one reality: The one who truly lives while embodied is the one who transcends death when departing. Wholeness, living fully in the present, and transcending death are the same Jacobian consciousness viewed from different angles.

Division and Unity

The brothers sensed that Jacob's presence had withdrawn - that Jacobian consciousness of wholeness had departed from them. They surmised that there must be a serpentine element of egoic division among them. Where there is strife, separation, seeing oneself as fundamentally divided from one's brother - the spirit of Jacob cannot dwell. The serpent principle had returned.

Moses and the Staff

Now we can return to Moses at the burning bush and understand what happened. God tells him His Name — a Name that speaks of being and ongoing presence: אהיה אשר אהיה, “I will be what I will be.” Why is this the first revelation to a people crushed by slavery? Because the deepest exile is not where the body stands, but where the consciousness lives. A person can stand in a foreign land, even in chains, and still preserve an inner freedom and meaning that no oppressor can touch, as Viktor Frankl would later testify from within the concentration camps. And a person can move freely, outwardly redeemed, yet remain imprisoned inside fear, anxiety, and the narrowness of self.

The Israelites, in their bondage, are so consumed with pain and survival that their awareness has shrunk to the narrow straits of constricted consciousness. They cannot see redemption because exile has taken root inside their minds. The first step, therefore, is not political but spiritual: to reawaken them to living — to the divine attribute of presence, to a way of being that is larger than sheer survival.

Then God makes a promise: The people will listen to you. Trust this. Be present with this reality. But Moses, mirroring the people, responds from anxiety: "והן לא יאמינו לי" — “But they will not believe me.” Why? Because he too has not fully embodied true presence. This is נחש — divination, prognostication, anxious calculation about the future rather than present trust in God’s word.

A staff, on the other hand, symbolizes the exact opposite. When Jacob, the epitome of wholeness and trust, the antithesis of the serpent, returns from Laban, he declares: "כי במקלי עברתי את הירדן הזה, ועתה הייתי לשני מחנות" (Genesis 32:11) — “With only my staff I crossed this Jordan, and now I have become two camps.” The staff symbolizes a state of no possessions, no contingencies, nothing but trust. Thus the staff and the serpent are polar opposites.

God asks: "מה זה בידך" — “What is this in your hand?” Rashi explained that this should be read as "מזה שבידך" — “from this that is in your hand.” We can adapt this reading as a diagnosis: You have moved away from this that is in your hand. Moses was holding the staff — the symbol of having nothing but trust. But Moses had moved away from it. He had dropped the staff-consciousness and fallen into serpentine anxiety.

The Lesson

God tells Moses: Throw down your staff. "וישלכהו ארצה ויהי לנחש" - When you abandon trust, when you drop the staff, it becomes a serpent. Your anxiety manifests. The future-worry takes over. Then: Grab the serpent by the tail. "ויהי למטה בכפו" (Exodus 4:4) - When you grab hold of the anxiety itself, when you confront it directly and return to trust, the serpent dissolves back into the staff. This is the teaching: Drop trust → anxiety appears (staff becomes snake) Grab trust → anxiety dissolves (snake becomes staff).  Jacob and the Serpent. The staff and the snake. Present trust and future anxiety. Living and surviving. These are the poles of human consciousness.

The Work Before Us

The brothers sensed the withdrawal of wholeness and correctly diagnosed its cause: division had entered among them. Moses abandoned trust and fell into anxious prognostication about the future. Our work is the opposite - to maintain unity, to hold the staff, to transcend survival consciousness, to actually live rather than merely survive. Where we achieve this, the spirit of Jacob - integrated wholeness, present trust - is not memory but reality. It dwells among us. And what dwells in wholeness, what lives fully in the present, does not die.